From Annabelle W.

From my personal experience, religion and breaking gender norms do not mix. I grew up in a conservative, baptist household where traditional gender norms were strongly held, encouraged, and valued. I had never questioned my parents’ views until high school, and after finally speaking up against those gender norms, I didn’t like the answers I received.

The mainstream, Christian perspective on roles for women are limiting and based on antiquated ideals. They include women being a supporter of their husbands, being kept pure (no sex) until marriage, allowing men to be the spiritual leaders at home and in the church, and women being the main home maker and raising the children. To defend this perspective, depending on which denomination you ask, husbands are then supposed to sacrifice themselves in their head-of-household role by granting women the ability to express themselves and be heard by their husbands. The husbands are expected to be pitied more because they have a lot of pressure as leaders and responsibility to maintain a household that’s wholesome and free from sin.

I remember my mom once telling me: “I let your dad know what I think, but ultimately, he makes the decisions.”

As a person who knows women are just as smart and capable as men, those words are hurtful. I believe Christianity’s gender norms are ill-suited for both men and women. One set of traits, such as leadership and strong spirituality, does not belong to one gender over the other. Decisions and sacrifices made within a household does not belong to one gender over the other. A person’s strengths, weaknesses, and personality traits are not dependent on gender but are unique to each individual. Upholding gender norms prevents both men and women the opportunity to express themselves and contribute to a marriage and household according to their own natural preferences.

I believe people should not be trapped into gender stereotypical roles, which harms both men and women. American culture in general struggles with pressuring people to follow gender norms, but I argue that Christianity is most likely one of the biggest contributors.

What do you think? The Atheist Voice has a few other personal interviews, and you can find them here. I’ll probably add another one of their videos in a bit.

The Atheist Voice also has a great platform for Hemant Mehta, which writes the blog Friendly Atheist.

The following is an interview with an Atheist couple who are a strong, positive example of a religion-free marriage. Both hold key roles in the Atheist community and demonstrate a true love for life. For privacy purposes, only their first names are mentioned.

1) Can you both please briefly describe how you were raised; were your parents religious?

Scott: I was raised Southern Baptist. Everyone in my family is either Southern Baptist or General Baptist although I don’t remember the difference. As a child, my mother would always take my sister and I to church every Sunday while my father slept in most Sundays. After my parents divorced, when I was 12, my father took me to church on the weekends that he had me and my mother took me to her new church when I was with her. I decided to be baptized when I was 16. I don’t remember what I expected to happen after the experience, but I do recall feeling absolutely no change in myself at all.

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This person has pushed through great odds to be where he is today. I congratulate him on all his hard work and hope his future continues to look bright. This interview is conducted anonymously, which will be explained under the first question I ask him. Please enjoy this personal Atheist’s story.

Anonymous Interview

Sarah: Can you briefly explain why you are keeping this interview anonymous?

Anon: In the industry I work in, it is very important to build a reputation and keep that reputation clean. In business today, people do not spend time with you to personally get to know you. All the information they need to know about you is found as easily as typing your name in Google. This could lead to disastrous losses in business opportunities for me. People who know me know my religious thoughts and ideologies. However, online business ‘stalkers’ do not need to know this information.

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Deanna is a warm hearted, friendly person. She makes you feel comfortable the minute you start talking to her. She was very kind to let me interview her. Enjoy!

Cara Fry Interview 7/28/12

Cara Fry sat comfortably next to me in the public library. She had a pink skirt on with a matching cream top. Cara was very warm and personable as she shared her story. Here is the interview.

Sarah: Tell me a little about your background.  How did you become an atheist? What was your family like, and were they religious?

Cara: I was raised Methodist in a moderately religious family. We went to church every week, and I went to Sunday school. When I was a teenager, I was involved in the youth group and went on all the outings and everything. Then in my late teens, I decided to get a little more serious about it. I decided that if I was going to be a good Christian, I should really read the bible from cover to cover and know what it is I’m saying I believe in. I read it and it went the other way. The conflicting information became very apparent. A lot of things weren’t in line with what I had been taught about, you know, how god was loving and all of that. So I kind of started to look around at other religions. I looked into Buddhism and tried to learn what I could about that for a while. I learned about Baha’i.

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Interviews are soon to come! If you would like to be interviewed, please go to the contact page.