From Annabelle W.

From my personal experience, religion and breaking gender norms do not mix. I grew up in a conservative, baptist household where traditional gender norms were strongly held, encouraged, and valued. I had never questioned my parents’ views until high school, and after finally speaking up against those gender norms, I didn’t like the answers I received.

The mainstream, Christian perspective on roles for women are limiting and based on antiquated ideals. They include women being a supporter of their husbands, being kept pure (no sex) until marriage, allowing men to be the spiritual leaders at home and in the church, and women being the main home maker and raising the children. To defend this perspective, depending on which denomination you ask, husbands are then supposed to sacrifice themselves in their head-of-household role by granting women the ability to express themselves and be heard by their husbands. The husbands are expected to be pitied more because they have a lot of pressure as leaders and responsibility to maintain a household that’s wholesome and free from sin.

I remember my mom once telling me: “I let your dad know what I think, but ultimately, he makes the decisions.”

As a person who knows women are just as smart and capable as men, those words are hurtful. I believe Christianity’s gender norms are ill-suited for both men and women. One set of traits, such as leadership and strong spirituality, does not belong to one gender over the other. Decisions and sacrifices made within a household does not belong to one gender over the other. A person’s strengths, weaknesses, and personality traits are not dependent on gender but are unique to each individual. Upholding gender norms prevents both men and women the opportunity to express themselves and contribute to a marriage and household according to their own natural preferences.

I believe people should not be trapped into gender stereotypical roles, which harms both men and women. American culture in general struggles with pressuring people to follow gender norms, but I argue that Christianity is most likely one of the biggest contributors.